Monthly Archives: May 2012

Water-Resistant Phone

I was upset about something and smacked something that catapulted my phone one day, like across the room and launched right into a bucket of cleaner.  And I ran across the room, screaming like a little girl.  Pulling out the phone, wiping it off, taking it apart and shit.  Barely any liquid got in that bitch.  But it ended up clean as fuck.

Audio of the Leprechaun Rant

Here’s a rant my husband has given more than once…well, really, it seems to be a combination of a few braided together as he does, oh so well.  

The Burning Bush-Leprechaun Rant

Image

Dashboard Duck

Dashboard Duck

His text: “I attempted to reason with this duck about the long looks and the perpetual staring. Duck wouldn’t listen.”

My text: “What?”

His text with picture: “Dashboard duck watches your junk bounce while you drive!”

My text: “You’re too funny.”

Jason Moments.

“I fixed Eve, and it’s exciting! But not as exciting as I have a Dremel,”  He said.

“You do have a Dremel,” I said.

“I do have a Dremel,” he said. “It’s exciting.”

Useless fact of the day:

Never assume that a 10 million isk spaceship can not beat a 75 million isk spaceship.

February Post from Facebook

I could not help myself, I stumbled upon this again, and I had to share. For my husband, this is pretty classic.

Hi. I post all sorts of craziness on this here wall. It won’t be changing anytime soon either. Things I normally post, when I post, are rants, bitches, complains, congratulatory , happy birthdays, sexy women pictures, fat guy videos, and so on. What you don’t see is a play for attention, through sympathy, by pulling the “woe is me” crap all the time. Now, I don’t have a problem with people expressing things that bother them. It is a viable way to get help from, or even relate to, those around you. This is where my problem with these “woe is me” people starts… Life can be great and life can be sad. It is most often both all at the same time, but never is it just one thing forever. If you seriously have no self worth and have zero drive to pick your ass up, dust it off, and keep going… GET THE HELL OFF MY PLANET! Allow me to side track for a moment. Sympathetic people, do your thing, but know when to stop feeding these bottomless pits of self imposed misery. Thank you. Back on track again.

To all those that suffer from actual depression not caused by laziness, over eating, too many foreign chemicals from fast food, or other self imposed causes. Seek help! Talk to your friends, talk to a counselor, take pills (LMFAO), or learn to be happy with who you are by striving to be who and what you want instead of settling for who and what you are.

To all those that suffer from depression caused by pills (yes pills for depression cause further depression by upsetting the natural chemicals in your body that regulate serotonin, which is primarily found in the INTESTINAL TRACT), over eating, not eating healthy, smoking, laziness, lack of self worth, lack of drive and motivation, and many many other factors… Shut the hell up, put down the fast food, stop smoking, , exercise, get a job, whip that damn kid for yelling at you, and quit being such a pain in my ass by sitting on yours!!! God I hate you people. Yes, HATE. As in the world would be better if you didn’t reproduce and have other little lazy fat bastards like you to whine and bitch all the time…

*breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out…*

Now… Do we all know someone who is a “woe is me” type? Yes. What should we do to curb their behavior and get them off the pity wagon? How about this: Quit feeding them your sympathy and your attention. Direct them to professionals and walk away. They will either learn to deal or they won’t.

If they do, great, pat your friend/family on the back when they rejoin the world of those of us trying to keep a smile up on a bad day by making jokes or doing other goofy stuff to make light in a dark time.

If they don’t learn to deal and fall into whatever it is depressed people fall into… Then YOU get to learn to deal without them. Pretty easy to do without them always dragging your mood down. Hell, I feel great after kicking soul sucking leeches out of my life. I’m also a bit stronger emotionally than most of you reading this too. Had my share of depression and feeling sorry for myself. I eventually got fed up with the feelings of it all, so I stood up, brushed my ass off, and got to work being someone that my kids would be proud of instead of someone that my kids will eventually support due to my poor decisions.

I know I know… This is a really long ranting post, but at least I’m walking away with a smile because I know that I have made some of you do the right thing and stop feeding the attention to the “woe is me” types. I smile and become more happy because I know that some of those types are about to change because they read this and get why half of their friends and family suddenly quit talking to them. I have hope for those who get the realization that life is what YOU make of it. I further grin my fool ass off because I can. I’m happy. I’ve gotten myself pretty far in life, but never on my own. I’ve asked for help and I hope those of you that need it eventually do too.

Thank you for reading this through. I hope I made a positive impact in my semi-harsh words.